My best friend friend cuts herself, she has been doing it for like, 3 years. I asked her why, but she doesn't know why, every time it's some other reason, she says. She has also cut herself, when a guy she liked (who didn't even know her) kissed some other girl, and well I got pretty mad and said she was stupid and stuff.. later she said the shouting had helped and would stop cutting herself but a week later she was doing it again.. In the beginning she liked to show me, but I said that, that made me 'depressed' (ofcourse not really depressed but pretty sad and mad).. Now she stopped telling me stuff and stopped showing me her cuts.. She cutts herself horizontal and vertical.. On her legs and arms, everywhere where she has skin.. But the problem of this is: I don't know how to react when she cutts herself.. I don't know what to say, where to look.. An other friend of mine had written/cut: HATE on her arm 2 years ago, you can still see it.. But I understand it for her, she has 'real' problems.. My other friend doesn't.. So this is my question for the people who cut theirselves: what should the people around you do?? How must they react, what must they say (I really want to help my best friend) Well for me, I wanted to cut myself one time, but I felt to good to cut myself (owkee, that sounds stupid..) I didn't wanted to be like my friend, because when she cuts herself it doesn't just hurt her, but also her parents and me.. so I did'nt wanted to do that...
First thing I'd like to say before I get into my experience in all of this is that my therapist told me that people who cut aren't suicidal. And some people do it for attention, or to be overdramatic - like the communityes on greatestjournal or livejournal where people are like, "OH NO MY LYFE SUX! -posts pictures of cuts-" Those are the people who make the ones who have serious issues feel like utter crap because somebody is mocking what they do. I am not claiming that you all here who do this, are doing it for attention. Just realize that it doesn't mean you want to kill yourself. I used to do what I call digging, which is when I would either use my fingernails and dig at my arms or I would use scissors, the edge of a plastic ruler or a protractor from those little sets we used to use in school. I have a three to four inch scar on my left forearm from it, which isn't really noticeable unless it's pointed out or I tan. I also have other little scars littered around both my arms from digging, also. I did it because I used to get so fustrated with myself and my emotions, so I'd sit there and dig myself. I haven't done it in about a year and it wasn't something I made a habit out of, but I just thought I'd share. Cutting was something that has never appealed to me since lately. I had the urge to cut myself, so bad that I was actually in the bathroom with a razor blade in my hand. But I couldn't do it. Invisioning the feeling of it cutting my skin was enough for me, so I just tossed it back into the medcine cabnit and forgot about it. This has happened a few times, but that was the closest I've got to doing it. I hate the feeling of getting even a papercut. It sends shivers and coldchills down my spine. So whenever I get the urge to "give it a try" or whatever, I imagine how it felt to have a razor sharp knife slice my finger open from when I took Cooking and then I don't think o fit anymore. And then my girlfriend whom I love so much, started to cut and do other things to harm herself and there was nothing I could do. Things are better now but for awhile there I was so scared and helpless. I nearly begged my Mom to help pay for her to fly here during Christmas so I'd know she was safe. Mom saw how upset I was and agreed, but her Mom had said no. So I talked to her, offered my e-mail, my phone number and everything until my fingers hurt from typing the same thing over and over. We made it through and she has finally realized that the only person who can help her is herself, and that she needs to do some serious searching for some way to help herself. I offered so many times for her to move here and see a therapist here (that way her Mom has no concent in saying no) so she can finally get the help she seriously needs. But she's afraid. And I tell her, I don't want to lose her like I lost my Grandmother - the two people who understand me better than my own parents do. I've even put my own serious problems aside to help her, which is a bad thing to do but she's imporant to me and I'd do anything for her. I even consider sh*t that's happened to me least important to hers because I can see her pain much more than I can see mine. Anyway, I just want you to know that there's nothing wrong with getting help. I'm not going to say you have to - it took me 2 times until I finally decided to break down the walls and spill out how I felt. But it REALLY does help. I know from experience even talking doesn't COMPLETELY heal all wounds, and medication ISN'T really all that bad as people make it sound. I read up on it and I'm planning on taking that as my next step. But I know I need the therapy to get over everything. Seriously, once you let one flood gate open, the others seem much easier. It's okay to cry, and it's okay to finally let those burdens free. You'd feel so much lighter if you did.
Well i have attmepted to cut myself before. I cut my legs a few times before so it wasn't blindingly obvious to everyone. This was all like last year though and i went through a serious depression period in my life where i seemed to think nothing was going right atal and i used it as my last resort. I could never really draw blood from it though and i don't know why. It just hurt far too much before the blade sank in and i couldn't do it. I'm glad of it now though. I stopped that a while back because i realised it was stupid of me. I made up excuses to try and cut myself at times. I stopped it all because my friends were getting really p***d with me being all depressed all the time and i lost many of them but since i stopped i got them back.
hold on, guys... yeah it probably will get better for some people, but for some, it never will. but we can get through... we'll make it. dont cut. its so hard to give up. i sound like your mom. but please dont.
i tried to stop cutting myself but i can't stop it. Because i had to say it to anyone i said it to my best friend and she was shocked...
i know. its extremely hard to stop. but we'll stop some day... i guess you just need to want to stop. i dont.
i cut every day... yeah im admitting it now i do it every f*cking day and i cant give it up. it helps. i tried giving up so many times but i cant. please dont cut.
i almost did once i kinda got 2 doing it and thought wtf am i doin!? i know loads of ppl that do it tho. i did really badly cut myself by accident tho dats wh yi think its stupid cuz it hurts!
I agree. If you guys cut or self mutilate, you don't have to tell the whole message board. I agree that talking about it can make people feel better, but for the other people who don't cut, it can be depressing. Yeah I know, just don't read the thread, right? Still, people should be able to look at alot of threads on here and not be totally depressed after one post
i think we're going to have a little arguement here. but i want to make one thing clear. for f*cks sake, nobody here wants to depress you little happy f*ckers. if you are offended/sad/whatever by this thread, why do you read it? i seriously dont get the human race. yeah now everybodys gonna jump on me for making this post. but i dont care. i love these forums. but thats not stopping me from saying what i feel like saying. yeah i know what youre thinking. people who cut just want attention. some do, and theres nothing wrong with it. i dont have a problem with the people that want attention. i just give it to them so that theyre happy. but others do it because they just want to die. but no, people wont ever think of it this way. "oh, my friend cuts, what a stupid b*tch. she just wants attention. she just wants to be popular". THATS JUST BULSHIT AND GET OVER IT PEOPLE DONT DO IT FOR ATTENTION. sorry for jumping on you like this. i dont mean to be that rude. and stop reading this thread. thank you.
First off, read what you like. If you get depressed click to 'General' and you'll be fine Second, why cutting? Why not buying a doll, some handglubs(??) and take the picture of your ex/dad/mom/whoeveryouhate and kick the #### out of it. I mean, isnt that better then having a chance to bleeding to dead? The doll will not feel pain, but you can releave some serious ass stress. Its hard for me to understand because i dont cut now, i just throw my teddybear to the wall and i'll be fine, so im sorry about that
chris - i already like you man. i so agree with that. and why cutting? thats a good question. i guess some people want to feel pain. watch the blood. i have this picture and underneath it says "i CUT because i wanna make things BETTER". i think thats really good. it is hypocrisity or whatever, cos you aint making anything good by cutting, but it explains how you feel. i think its really good.
I agree. If you guys cut or self mutilate, you don't have to tell the whole message board. I agree that talking about it can make people feel better, but for the other people who don't cut, it can be depressing. Yeah I know, just don't read the thread, right? Still, people should be able to look at alot of threads on here and not be totally depressed after one post [/b][/quote] I suppose I can understand from your perspective, but their comment was a tad harsh. You are right when you said that people should be able to read the threads and not be totally depressed after reading them. But they will always be one or two topics that will have a somewhat depressive side. And in my opinion, we're not telling the whole message board when we post. At least that wasn't my intention when I shared my story. I appreciate hearing other cutter's stories because I know I'm not alone and I can relate. I'm sorry if it's hard to swallow or the entire ordeal sounds so negative and depressing. But that's the way some things are.
I suppose I can understand from your perspective, but their comment was a tad harsh. You are right when you said that people should be able to read the threads and not be totally depressed after reading them. But they will always be one or two topics that will have a somewhat depressive side. And in my opinion, we're not telling the whole message board when we post. At least that wasn't my intention when I shared my story. I appreciate hearing other cutter's stories because I know I'm not alone and I can relate. I'm sorry if it's hard to swallow or the entire ordeal sounds so negative and depressing. But that's the way some things are. [/b][/quote] I know. That's why I didn't bash the threads. I think it's good to have one or two for people to talk about their feelings, but just as long as the whole board doesn't become depression-ville like at the LPU.
I know. That's why I didn't bash the threads. I think it's good to have one or two for people to talk about their feelings, but just as long as the whole board doesn't become depression-ville like at the LPU. [/b][/quote] Hopefully that won't be the case.
i feel like b*tching about lpu right now. it sucks. but anyway i guess thats not being nice here so whatever. but yes, lpu is really depressed. and too many people come on it. it kind of brings you down. and they dont use any cheerful colors. but anyway.