Suicide

ive think about this topic at least 49 times, in less then a year, but i woulnt even attempted, i have too many things to love, but have more guilt of thinking of it. my.life.sucks. :'(

 

i hate it when ppl go on and on saying how "suicide is stupid" and shit. i dont need to hear that. w/e its your opinion, but it is kinda mean.

and i never thought of sucide because life was "hard" i thought it would be better for everyone else if i was gone, i thought that i was a bother or a dissapointment to them and that they would be happier w/o me. it wasnt an escape for me, it was suposed to be a reliefe for them.


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grr lpa is fucking up. :angry:

 

I have thought of it ,yes. That was one year ago. But I'm glad I never did it.

 

i thought about it quite a few times, especialy recently, though i have this policy, that if i think about it for more than 3 days without thinking twice at any point, then i may consider doing it. but usualy i find that suicidal thoughts tend to go away after a while so that never happens, as i think it would be.... how do i say it... frustrating to commit suicide then afterwards (supposing there is an afterwards) think 'wait, if i had given it a while, i could have got over that.' but you couldnt do anything about it then. i mean i know i really need to be thankful for what i have, and i am, but most of what i did have just kind of dissapeared in the last month or so just because of one rumour. many times i thought about ending it all but i just pulled myself through. so i need to be thankful for what i have but also i miss what i had, andi'm not exactly your most able human being as i have a writing difficulty... it isnt much but it really annoy's me when people treat me differntly because of it (come on, a few months back one teacher said 'why dont you go and see this teacher? she deals with people like you' which made me sound like i was scum and looked down on) and so that has also made me think twice about living, though right now i have something to live for, so my life wont be ending any time soon (not if i can help it anyways)

 

yeah, this is exactly how i feel alot of the times. i feel like i am such a bother to everyone and it would be better for everyone else if i wasn't here anymore.

 

I used to be suicidal. I wasn't suicidal because my girl broke up with me or any type of crap like that, though. I've always contemplated suicide only because my life is unfair at times. However, I learned to overcome that. I used to think I wasn't worth living, wasting time, space, air, etc., but it's really just a really bad way to look at yourself, you know?

People always tell me that I don't understand because I say suicide is dumb. As much as people will tell me that, they have no idea, I would think. I've attempted suicide quite a few times, but of course, now that I look at it, I'm such a fool, IN MY OPINION.

I really stopped contemplating suicide when an old friend of mines whom I hadn't seen for about three years due to going to different schools commited suicide. I mean, no matter how much one wants to believe no one would care that they died, that's really not true. There's always going to be someone who is going to be sad to see you disappear from this earth.

I've been to the depths and I understand everyone with problems, but I honestly feel that suicide is never the answer, and I think one major problem with people who have suicidal tendencies don't realize what could be done. Sometimes one's life will be crappy, but you never know... End your life now, might miss out on something amazing, we never know.

Of course, I'm not here to lecture, but before anyone who may find me being judgemental not be a hypocrite without knowing my background. I was really suicidal at one point, at a point I even knew right there and then, "I should leave directions for my parents to announce my passing to all my online friends as I won't be here to do it." But honestly, coming from someone who fought to make his life better from when my life was horrible, I say that please, don't turn to suicide.

I have been to hell & beyond and back, and I know what people go through, and I think anyone who contemplates suicide just needs someone to talk to. If you feel you have no friends, then find help--there is NOTHING wrong with finding help. Help is there for a reason, and as much as people will tell me again, that I don't understand, I do, and I know that it does help. It does help to let a professional hear your story, then from there they can help to make your life better. I come from a shit life, horrible background and horrible environments, but I still face days head on, don't give up.

For anyone contemplating suicide, contact me and we can talk. I am busy a lot, and a lot of the time I am a sarcatic fool, but if you need to talk to someone on a serious note, I'm here to listen--I've been told I'm a pretty good listener. Even if you don't know me and just need to vent, I'll try to listen and comprehend anything holding you down. I'm not guaranteed to help/fix your problems, but at least know you got someone to talk to.

And I do agree with what was said--The only way things will change is if you make a change. Appreciate yourself, don't put yourself down so much; always look towards the positives. Every individual has potential to do great things, but if you cut yourself off before you even let it get going, then you'll never know. Sometimes it's hard, no doubt, but it's always going to be better if you believe it will be. This is a reason I do look towards religion, and don't get me wrong, but this is what I believe is the core of religion. Not the faith in one, but faith in self is most evident. I think if you can have faith in not only hope, but your self, it'll be better. As for myself, I am an atheist, but that doesn't mean I don't have faith in myself. So you don't have to have a religion to believe in yourself.

 

You know, Keaton, I never get a chance to say this, because I'm kind of a lazy person, or it escapes my mind. But I admire you a lot, I really do. I always find that your posts are in the upmost helpful, or just intruiging to read. Either way, I appreciate a lot that you take the time to type nearly essays sometimes, all at the expense of helping someone else whom you may not even know in person. Like I said, I'm not suicidal nor have I ever been, but I have a feeling that what you wrote is going to affect someone positively.

 

No problem. I mean, I've been to the other side and back, and hopefully someone does take positivity away from what I have to say as I only say what I do with the best intentions.

Thanks for the appreciation.

That also goes for anyone else, as well.

 

it has and thank you. :hugz:

 

If you even think about suicide you need help

 

everyone needs help in some way or another. what is "normal"? no one knows and no one has a definition. if you think about suicide it does not mean you are defective. you just think that is the only way out. not that it is an excuse for people that think that, and i am not saying that you are thinking clearly, but sometimes things get too hard.

 

Sometimes you need to help yourself.

 

my thoughts on everything, which is why it annoys me when people are called insane or dissabled, because who defines sane? and who defines able? there is no perfect being so there is no way to define anything and put people into catagories like that.

 

my thoughts on everything, which is why it annoys me when people are called insane or dissabled, because who defines sane? and who defines able? there is no perfect being so there is no way to define anything and put people into catagories like that. [/b][/quote]
Whereas that is a valid point, that's exactly what I mean by cutting one's self short.

If anyone continues to believe that their mind frame which defies "normallity" is true, I'm sorry, but you need to wake up. There are billions of people in this world, and if you justify such a thought as the being of which is that of normallity is undeniable, you need to understand something.

I, myself, do not believe in perfection--that there is no "normal." However, over the years of such analyzation, I've come to realize that normallity is a basis of personal perception. This means that indeed it is all to one's opinion, however, many times, environment or different forms of encouragement of one lifestyle becomes the fit normallity, and us as humans do it, we do label one lifestyle normal whether that be our own or another and it's perfectly normal. The feeling of abnormallity comes from a lifestyle we're unsure of which confuses a lot of people--this usually ends up with fear as they do not know how to react.

The state of mind, however, any must understand is that if you continue to fight for the opinion of the billions who walk this earth, you are ignorant, and I hate to say that. I do not say this to bash anyone, but if you come to terms with reality, you'll realize not everyone will be like you. To question abnormallity is one thing, and to act is another.

So in the sense you are upset with the fact people would believe suicidal tendencies to be abnormal, you, yourself in some instances are believing the same about these folks. Their abnormallity to not understand you is the motivation for your negativity, or so it seems.

Like I said, I've been there, I used to think no one could understand me, but if you want people to understand, you need to show them. It might be hard as hell, but sooner or later, they will understand. Suicide is extremely hard to overcome, especially if life isn't going in any positive direction for you, I know this all too well, but that doesn't mean you give up and say "everyone sucks."

However, on topic, you cannot associate perfection or normallity with suicide. Though this is an encouragement towards suicidal tendencies, to be isolated from peers, it's seriously probably the most wrong motive to contemplate suicide. There are a lot of ways you can combat that isolation. You can disassociate yourself from those who make you feel bad, or you could all in all find better people. If family is the issue, then seek help.

I do agree that those who do not understand that the word "help" is not a curse nor a curse word will all-out make fun of it. I believe this is the reason my friend commited suicide--Knowing he couldn't talk to anyone without looking like some type of "psycho." Even the media displays "help" for "those who are below the average" as wrong but such fears are useless. If in fact you live in such fear your whole life, it's just as bad as cutting yourself short, in my opinion--Sometimes it takes your extra step to show people that you in fact can prove them wrong. That yeah, you might have some mental issues right now, but you'll be damned if you're going to let it stop you from achieving something great.

By the way rossana, just to kind of set the record straight, sanity is definable to some extent. Those who in fact do have mental disabilities are definable, and thus meaning their sanity differs from you and I. The question you should ask is not sanity, but personallity because with all do respect, sanity is definable. It's the reason we have psychologist; their sole purpose is to define a level/capacity in one's mind.

Annnd, Kevin. Your words are such words people who have suicidal tendencies don't need to hear. Blunt remarks like that are horrible, horrible things to hear and are pretty much rude at this point and time. It's like telling a person with no leg that they have no leg. Completely disrespectful and pretty disregarding to the situation at hand.

In my opinion, the question of normallity and ability should stop. Yes, who are we to say what is normal? But at the same time, who are we to question people who question us? Should we live in a forever-questioning-each other world, or would we rather show that that which they question is not only illogical, but completely pathetic and useless to have questioned in the beginning? What I think a lot of people need to realize is complaining doesn't change anything, and if you continue to complain about everything bad in your life, yet you never seek help to solutions, then the only person you can blame is yourself. If someone is judging you, ask them why they do so or get authority to help.

Trust me, I have thought about everything people think about in this thread. I, too used to question my peers, I questioned everyone around me, but if we always defy everything and dislike the outcomes, or aren't ready for it's reactions, then I suggest you cease asking those questions, at least until you know you're ready for some hard hitting truth, lies or assumptions. It's never easy, but no one said life was easy.

edit: By no means do I encourage violence. I forgot to say that. In no way do I encourage you to take it to a violent level of compromise. Violence will only strike negativity into one, whether it is fear or anger. Please do not take what I say with 100% truthful heart as I battle my own demons. All I am saying is that there are solutions. They might or might not solve many of problems we face today, but it beats being miserable. However, do not take a gun to school and shoot anyone nor go up to someone and punch them out. Please think rational.

 

Every once in a while a suicidal thought comes into my head, but then I kill it by asking myself, "What the fuck would that achieve? So many people would miss you, it's not even funny." Then think of something else completely different so it doesnt come back. Works for me.


If anyone does have any problems, I'm here. I've talked a bunch of people out of it.

 

I second that. Thanks Keaton! :hugz:

 

Well, I first thought of suicide at about 10 years old. I then thought about all the people who would be disappointed, and my parents wondering what they did wrong. I've gotten over it, and 14 years later, here I am.




Oh yeah, I'm always willing to listen and help.


EDIT: I was about to commit suicide, until I saw a few heavy metal concerts here, and I found out that there are better things to live for. So it's not quite unfair to say music saved my life.

 

- agree.
sometimes ppl say things like that and cut themselves just to get attention. i know ppl like that. i use to talk to them and what i found is that they feel "longly" to put in a nice way.

 

I don't know. When I look at my life, I've made a complete waste. I'm a smart kid, gifted, I can do stuff with the computer (although not as well as, say, Keaton, it's enough to impress some people), I can write and a bunch of numerous other things. But I've wasted it away by being lazy, stupid, and the like. I'll admit, I've made some stupid decisions in my life (as all have), and now it seems to have screwed me over. I'm good, but not great. Not above and beyond. It upsets me at times because I know my parents used to expect such high things from me, and slowly they've had to get used to my mediocrity. It sucks because I know that they know that I can do better, and I know I can. This far into it I can't really change. I've tried. But I can't.

I look forward into my life and I don't see anything. I've done no planning for the future. I've wasted it away hanging out with friends, which, although I value that more than school, doesn't help me in the real world. College? Haven't even started thinking about it. Career? Like there's anything I excel at. I have nothing going for me, no great plan for life. A lot of people don't, but for me... I just feel wasted.

Around my friends... I don't know. Many people have told me that I act differently when I'm with people than when I'm not, life, for example, hanging out with only one friend or while online. Two different personas... one's a complete ass and the other is me. I act like an ass to please people, because face it, I'm a people pleaser. I try to make people happy by making them laugh. Whether by sarcasm, stupidity, etc. And it takes away from what I really am. And I hate that side of me. But when I truly act like myself, which is majorly pessimistic and depressive at times, people get worried. And as a people pleaser... bleh. Forever looping.

I don't know... more later. I need to get out of the rut.