Out.

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by FreeYourMind, Jun 27, 2005.

  1. #1
    FreeYourMind

    FreeYourMind Well-Known Member

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    I saw the sunset, last night
    fall over a country, so green, and pale.

    In dreams it was green,
    the place where I lay in your arms
    and stare into the eyes that weren't mine.

    But I found,
    I cán't go on pretending, or
    see life just like a blurred dream.

    Nothing is real, and everything is a copy.
    Somethings in life, I can erease
    With a marker. If I want

    My mother yelling,
    the cigaret burning in my flesh
    The rose you picked with hurtfull thornes
    Are sadly, unereaseable
    And just too true.
     
  2. #2
    lp_sk8ergurl

    lp_sk8ergurl Well-Known Member

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    You did really good on this piece keep it up.
     
  3. #3
    Darcy

    Darcy LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    That's my favorite part, but I really like the whole thing.
     
  4. #4
    fallenangel

    fallenangel Well-Known Member

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    this was just bitter sweet beauty!

    i love this one, the imagery was amazing with such little words.
     
  5. #5
    D_A_V_I_D

    D_A_V_I_D Pure Pwnage

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    i agree, i liked it, the way it was written it made me feel like i was wandering through the poem, it was a wierd feeling. Great work.
     
  6. #6
    a life in ashes

    a life in ashes mercury summer

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    awesome work, keep it up!
     
  7. #7
    TheZackStump

    TheZackStump Member

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    Is that accent on the a in cán't there on purpose? I am curious, what does it mean? Does it indicate the word should be pronounced a certain way?
     
  8. #8
    FreeYourMind

    FreeYourMind Well-Known Member

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    Eh.. Lol. No It was actually a spellingmistake, I wasn't at my home when I wrote it, and the keyboard was really freaky so...
    But yea,in a way, you could put an accent on there. Cause you really cant.
    Or something like that.

    Btw. Thanks for all your comments. really sweet. :chemist:
     

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