Got Something You Want To Let Out?

Reinventing the wheel

Isn't that just one long way of saying 'emo'?

 

In a way. XD

Anyway. Shall we all get back on topic now?

 

yes, let's.


i am starting to feel like a loser for all the drugs i have been doing lately. i have not been doing them like party-wise, but more because i have been in so much pain and i wanted to get rid of it. and now i feel bad.

 

I can't stand these people that I know. It is like my best friends and the ones that care about me the most are 2000+ mi away. I don't think I like that at all.

This one guy is "fragile" but he is such a prick. Any time I tell him anything he tries to stomp on it. Then I say something....nothing really, and he gets pissed at me and either deletes me or blocks me! It is rediculous! I used to like him, but he needs to grow the fuck up!

I was depressed becuase my love...my first love, dumped me on our one year anniversary and never gave me a reason. Now, a year and three months later he has moved back to Reno and is trying to be my friend. It's like he wants either a booty call or a girl friend out of me and I can't stand it! I wish he would just leave me alone! I don't want to deal with him!
And it isn't even like he would want me back if he knew how jaded I am now. I really hate that I am...but at the same time I can say that "I've been there and done that." It is all just so weird. I used to be the sweet, innocent one...now i've done too much and just look like that on the outside now. I don't even want to talk about it.

Grr....I'm sorry. I'm just not very happy tonight. That guy not talking to me really upset me for some reason. He is a baby. Just because you're 28 doesn't mean you know anything better than me. I've experienced more than most people. ...I'm not sure how good that is, though.

 

yeah i feel the same way about michael, cuz that is kinda like a mixture of what you guys are saying...and usually i do good.

but then i think, what if we are soulmates and i gave it up? we were perfect together, no one understands this, we still kinda are, we can read each other's minds and shit like that. he said if that is the case then it is his fault for letting me go but i see it as my fault for giving up on him. i have faith in his love for me, he still does and i know it, but right now he is being immature. i just think what if he decides to grow up? i don't really have faith in much at all these days, and i don't want to set myself up to fall, but i don't want to give up either. he always comes back, but this time there is just a lot of shit going on with people lying and he has to get that shit straightened out.

i know i deserve better, but what if there isn't any out there? i love him with everything i have and it is so wrong. i want him back!

 

michael was the right person...even though he fucked me over in the end.

i didn't have sex with him until after we broke up but i wasn't ready before.

i don't regret it. i regret the relationship, but i felt everything for him that i wanted to feel with the person that i lost my virginity to.

he was a virgin too, maybe that is part of it.

 

I'm so fucking confused right now.

I went to the movies with Alex today to go see Rent and had a great time. However, he sort of made some 'advances' on me. I do like him but I've heard things about him using girls. On multiple occasions. And I'm scared.

So now on top of everything I think Alaina hates me for liking him.

Jesus Christ, I'm just so confused.

 

Wow...and I thought my girlfriend problem was bad. Well, I still owe you for helping me a while back. While I was dating Jennifer, some of my friends (Trustworthy ones) kept telling me she was using me to get back with her old boyfriend. I figured I'd wait it out, and when I got enough evidence, decide what to do. Of course, things ended up with me having to dump her, but that's not the point. Don't let some rumors get in the way of your feelings. If you really think there's good in this guy, try and bring it out. But it's like standing on train tracks; If you think something won't turn out good, don't wait and get hit with it when it'll hurt. Get away while you can.

I hope that made some kind of sense to you...

 

I'd advise you to send her a small text tonight (A), telling her that you need to talk to her (but try not to sound like you're asking her out, if you want, mention that you don't feel like that anymore), and then tell her the whole deal tomorrow. Don't, however, make her feel as though it would be ludicrous to like her, and that you only did it because you were piss-drunk, that might offend her. I'm not sure if this is good advice, but seeing as I actually went through this (from the other side) and I ended up going out with the guy. Apparently in the beginning he did it to see how I was going to reply, but then asked me out for real. I only found out about the beginning part after we'd broken up. So, don't put off the meeting, because she'll end up finding out somehow.

 

It did but it's always hard for me to trust guys as it is.

But hearing these things about him made it worse.

And I almost kissed him at the movies.

I'm so confused. Stupid goddamn teenage hormone-fulled angst.

and i think i forgot to mention that he's kind of 3 years older than me. =\

 

Three years isn't that much of a difference! Age is only a number!

 

Lucky you. He was one of those guys that will make you feel like a princess for a few weeks, then turn back into the stubborn, spoilt little brat he really is.

Edit: oh, and I don't mean "lucky you" in a sarcastic way. I appreciate guys who don't jump at a chance to fuck somebody... sadly that isn't a lot of people I know

 

Don't let it bother you,it'll be worth the wait. My friend is 19. And I wouldn't want you to end up regretting it like me.