Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

I think im going to take a leave from LPA for a little while
i need to sort things out in my life and try to fix them
life has dealt me a shitty hand over the last couple of days and i really need time to think
i probably will be back soon..even tho you guys probably dont care because none of you really know me all that well...i really hope i can fix these things and things can get better for me..i dont know but i hope to be back here as soon as possible...so for now
Goodbye LPA =(

 

Good luck Jake.

 

It was nice having you around, and if you want we are all here for you (PM if you'd like ).

 

Hey take care alright? Try to make the best of things for yourself, Take a new perspective.

 

Good luck, Jake. Hope everything works out for you.

 

Peace out Jake. Hope you find what you're looking for.

===

And I want to apologize for the way I am on here sometimes. You know, all the times I say "Yeah, i'm leaving here" but come back the very next day, all the times i've been a douchebag, all the times that i've been completely uncontrollable and unstable. I have no freakin' clue how everybody can handle me around here when my head is usually upside down and off it's axis most of the time. But for the ones who can deal with me, thank you.

 

Fuck racists. Seriously. I've only realised over the past couple of days how much I really hate that stuff. This country is going to shit alright, but it's not who they think that's at fault. It's them among others.

 

Racists, nationalists, and people that are far too intolerant terrify me.

 

One day I'd like to meet a British nationalist that actually has more than a little knowledge of their own country's history.

 

Well, good luck. I hope you figure things out and things do get better for you.


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I think of leaving LPA a lot, almost every day. But in the end I don't even though I need to. It's not because of anyone here annoys me or anything but it's because I feel I spend way too many hours online and on a forum but on the other hand when I'm here I can just pretend that my life isn't all shit most of the time. I get very depressed and very stressed out, I have insomnia, I try to get a job but I don't have any luck, and when I do get lucky something comes up allowing me to not be able to work, trying to get settled into a college is frustrating. I know I need to spend less time online but I've made some good friends, and it's an outlet for me just let myself relax a bit.

 

I knew she'd quit talking to me once I asked her if she'd want to see a movie with me some time. I didn't even really say it had to be any time soon, just when I was in Kent next. And if she couldn't, then fine. I'm actually getting kind of sick of asking her every so often on the off chance that she'll say yes. It's irritating. And actually, I think Derek's the only person here who even knows who I'm talking about, since half my poems were about her and we talked about her seemingly every day, like, four years ago. I feel like Ginny in the Harry Potter books: "I never gave up on you, not really."

 

I hate being at a stalemate that just makes me want to cry. You insist that you know nothing about it and I think you're lying. And you know that I don't believe you, but you stick to your guns. I'm not okay.

 

Who's this about, if you don't mind me asking?

 

Nationalists are okay.

Well, I am talking about (Pakistan) a country which actually needs nationalists. The country is on the verge of breaking up, because no one really cares about Pakistan. It's really really sad.
Nationalism on the verge of racism though, is not acceptable.

 

Arlene You stick to your own guns, babe.

And Aisha, it's bordering on racism here. Actually, for a lot of people, it's crossed that border.

 

Josh. Again. I just feel like we've been fighting a LOT more recently.

And thanks Mali.

 

I'm sorry. You can always talk to me about it in more depth if you want.

 

Thanks, but no thanks.

I just want to throw up and then make myself...numb.

 

Sorry to hear about this, hun.

 

Something's gotta go wrong 'cause I'm feeling way too damn good

Thanks.