Got Something You Want To Let Out?

Maybe it wasnt a good idea to talk things out

 

that's me right there :wth:

 

:hugz: thank you.

You are right, ofcourse. What's happening now is over te top.. And a bit childish. But what else to do when emotions have run so high and they cannot be talked out? Email isn't a viable option for me, telephone isn't a viable option for her.. These boards are all that are left. I just hope Leones will finally agree to talk it out, then this whole ordeal is hopefully, finally over. Both parties are to blame, she for doing all that shit, and me for having to let it all out. But one hour somewhere, talking it all out, could remedy that, though she's always refused that in the past. It's like she's cut me off, and the only way it has any impact on her is when i begin hurting her. The other way around is 'allright'? I can only hope she'll agree to talk it out for once, for I don't see any other options left.. It cannot continue, that is something that's very clear though.

All I need, or want, is a sincere apology, a sincere promise that she can let me go, will let me go, and that she'll stop with this shit. It's the only way I can stop, for it's my last line of defense against her actions.

As I already said, both parties are to blame. But because she's always refused to talk it out, this just kept going and going and going.. it just has to stop, no doubt about it.

Cameron: Let me get back to you on that.

 

There some huge Jerry Springer shit going down here.

 

I really fucking hate life right now

I'm excluded from my school for standing up to a racist person,then that racist person got 5 of his racist friends to jump me and they broke my arm,I can only watch as my girlfreind is so ill and my sports team just lost

THANKS LIFE!!!

 

Don't

Just imagine life a few years from now for that racist guy and his buddies.. They'll probably live in the gutter somewhere, dealing crack, getting beaten up every weekend, their girlfriends being pimped, and generally being all time losers.

That image should make you somewhat happier

 

This is a very huge confession.


My mom let me go to a sleepover at a friend's house. She has this 3-4 year old brother, and this is the weirdest thing. He is so...I have no idea how to describe it. He was so...delicious o.0 The whole time he was sitting on my lap while we were watching Kill Bill 2 and towards the end I was lying down and so was he. (He was lying in front of me, and I had my arms around him and it was very comfortable.) And if you have watched Kill Bill 2, The Bride's daughter BB was doing the same thing, The Bride was lying on the bed with BB at her side, watching TV. Lol, it was so ironic. We were lying down watching a movie about people lying down watching a movie. The urge to do Something to him was awful, lol.

And then the morning after, I got a wake up call because I was peacefully sleeping and he came and sat on top of me, giggling. Lying on top of me and poking my face.

[How would you like to wake up with a yummy little boy on top of you? ]

And he wouldn't stop poking till I woke up, after which he and the host's other sibling started piling pillows on me and sitting on me.

He ran over, took the cheese nachos from my friend, ran back, and was removing the pillows from my head and carefully pushing them into my mouth, lol, because I couldn't move from the weight of two little boys on top of me, plus all the pillows.


I'm becoming a paedophile, molesting little boys like Michael Jackson. o.0 I must the youngest one ever.

 

This is nothing compared to the post above, but I've got to let something out anyways. By now, I obviously don't care any longer if 'she' reads this or not.

She's done it *again*.

She came to see my in my break, saying she wanted to talk with me (wich apparently meant: talk *to* me). So we went for a little walk. She demanded that she be heard completely, so I let her speak her mind virtually uninterrupted, I only said that there were a few points I would touch upon later. Then, after she was finished, I demanded that I, also, be heard completely. Because she had every right, but I had every right too! Yet, when I hadn't even spoke 10 words (about that I think she should offer a apology), she said she wasn't going to listen to me, I should just aquiscue(sp?) to her demands and be done with it, and she walked away. Things got heated, verbally, after that and she was crying in the hallway and I was shaking like hell in the cafeteria.

A friend came to see me with the story she has told him (that I should just bow under her demands, that I should stop saying *anything* about this because when she believes it's talked out it's talked out and what I think about it does not matter, that she's right and I'm wrong and that kinda crap), proving that yet again, she's willing to spill her frustrations about me to whomever will listen, regardless wether I know that person or not, not caring about the fact that I will hear it and it will hurt me.

If I was back when the relationship just ended, with this knowledge, I would have been more of an asshole instead of a sweet guy. Maybe, *maybe* if I've sprayed around so much comments about her as she's done to me, *maybe* if I didn't let it all in because i didn't want to hurt her.. Maybe then she would have realized that it needs to come from *two* sides!!! Because right now, she still doesn't.

She's *still* only experiencing everything from *her* point of view. All that she cares about is letting *her* frustrations out, and that's 'talking it out' for her. Yet it's universally accepted that to 'talk things out', *both* sides must be able to tell his/her side of the story. She's never let me in the past, and she still doesn't let me now! And she's *continuing* to paint me black, to say how much she hates me etc, even to my own fucking friends. :angry:

And yet again, she's measuring with 2 different measures! It's allright if she demands to be heard completely, yet I cannot? Because, apparently, in her view, she's much better then me. Much more worth as a person then I am. Such utter crap, yet she acts that way.

This has really got to stop. I sent her an sms a few hours later, stating that we should TALK THINGS OUT for once, instead of just ranting and walking away, wich she's done more times in the past, yet never let me rant let alone tell *my* side of the story. That we haven't talked it out, even if she believes we did, since I *still* haven't been able to tell my side of the story, I *still* haven't heard an apology and a sincere promise to stop hurting me everywhere she can, and I *still* only saw childishness and the inability to view things from another's point of view.

She needs to grow up, I really don't see any other option. I mean, I've got my own faults, that's for sure. But when I asked whatever I've done wrong to deserve this, the only thing she said was: "You should stop with commenting! The only one who's doing anything wrong is you! We had talked it out already (at that point I interrupted that we've, actually, never talked anything out yet) and you should be gone!". IF I SHOULD BE GONE, THEN WHY THE HELL DOESN'T SHE STOP WITH THIS SHIT?

I cannot make myself invulnerable to all the comments she posts everywhere and says to everone, until I'm over her and I cannot do that until she stops being so damned egotistical. She needs to stop living in that little fantasy world of her where everything that exists is her, and her only. When you break up a relationship, you *both* break up, and as such, you *both* have to be careful around another. You *both* make sure that you give the other the oppertunity to get over you.

I gave her the oppertunity, but she *still* haven't given me mine. And I'm sick of it.

Yet again, I post it here because I've got nowhere else to do it. Everyone I tell the story to, even those who've also heard hér side, all say she's right in that I need to be able to ignore all the comments she's making, since she's just painting herself off as a very childish person, yet they also say that she indeed has the obligation to *let* me do exactly that. And she's not.

How can I make her realize that she needs to think about others for once in her life, and she needs to act like a grown up, offer her apology and stop making these comments everywhere I come and to everone I know?

And, at the same time, how can I make myself be less hurt by all these coments she's making?

At this point, I too have a wish that I never had a relationship with her. I should have broken it up when it became more then just sexual attraction. This I can say because at this point, the trouble isn't worth it anylonger. She has destroyed all good memories I had of her with all this shit (wich was my largest concern), she's destroying *me* with all this shit and she's even dragging me down to that level. I haven't shouted at a girl in years, yet she gets so under my skin because of all this that I did, today. And I'm mad because of it.

If she does't stop, then I don't know what else to do... I don't see any other options. I need to defend myself, or I'll go under and lose my sense of identity and i'll be back to throwing myself in front of a train, just as i've done quite a few years back. I will not allow that to happen again, but what can I do? This is my last idea, to talk it out.. but if that doesn't work, what then? Call her until she gets sick of it, make life at school a living hel for her? I can't do that, I'm a sweet guy and I cannot ever forgive myself if I should do anything of that, yet if she doesn't leave me no other option I don't know what else to do..

Does anyone have other options?

I just want this freak shit to end... :'(

All my friends warned me of her, maybe I should have heeded their warnings.

Edit: Oh my god, this is absolutely unbelievable, I'm shaking with anger here. I just got called by her mom (she obviously only told her side of the story), who wouldn't let me speak either. She told me that I should stop posting on these forums, and that I should ignore anything Leones says.

How the HELL can I do that if she keeps on saying all these stuff about me to my fucking own friends? When she keeps on saying all this stuff about my on LPA and on MySpace? When she still refuses to apologize for her actions, she still refuses to listen to me, and she still only thinks of herself?

I've told my mom all of this, also what Leones's story is that she told me.. And she said that I'll probably never get an apology, since Leones in all certainty not mature enough for that yet. Yet, at the same time, I cannot make her destroy my fucking life at school and on the internet. IT HAS TO STOP. SHE HAS TO QUIT MEDDLING IN *MY* LIFE, SHE HAS TO QUIT TRYING TO HURT ME IN ANY WAY POSSIBLE, AND SHE HAS TO QUIT PAINTING ME BLACK IN FRONT OF MY OWN FRIENDS!

I realizes that she doesn't have a lot of friends, but that is NO reason to try to take mine away from me!


Edit: I know, i know.. I've calmed down a bit and I know that I should be the most mature, and I should ignore all the comments. But how do I do that, when she posts them everywhere AND say them to EVERYONE, including my OWN friends? She has nothing to do with my friends, so she has nothing to talk about with them, she should leave them alone and she should leave me alone.

And instead of just stopping with painting me black in front of all my friends, she just calls in for more reinforcements, like her mom. Who's next? her dad? They both see me as 'the evil guy who had sex with our precious little daughter', probably, so ofcourse they'll only believe her. What should I do, get my mom involved with it? I don't want that (I'm not that childish) and she doesn't want that either.

The only thing she says about it is that I should have recognized it when we met.. That it was obvious something like this could probably happen. But it's a mistake that has already been made, and I can't turn that back. How can I salvage this mess then?

She won't let me go, she won't leave my life. It almost sounds as if *she*'s the one who got dumped, even though we both broke up. It's almost as if *I*'m the one who suggested breaking up, even though she did. She should realize that, because we broke up, we have *nothing* with each other anymore, and that making hurtfull comments about me whereever she can, and refusing to apologize and generally try to make my life as miserable as possible, doesn't help. She doesn't want to deal with her feelings, she tries to drive me away, that much is very obvious, everyone who knows the whole story tells me as much. But she must realize that this doesn't work! It doesn't drive me away, it only fuels me desire for Righteousness! I want justice. I apologized, I want her to apologize for the same. I did not make her life miserable, I want her to stop making mine miserable.

She needs to deal with her feelings instead of trying to drive me away by hurting mine, because it *does not work*

And I'm not willing to let myself fall back into a depression because of her actions. I will not let that happen, ever.

I haven't slept in three days because of this shit, and it's only getting worse. I'm afraid I might snap and be a complete asshole and make her life miserable just as she's trying to do with mine if this goes on any longer. :'(

 

I've thought it over.. and I've really had it. I'm going to the cops. Something I've never done before, but someone informed me that they also have a preventive function. I'll talk to them, they'll go and talk to her... And maybe she'll realize that she should stop terrorizing my life (a bit strong in wording but essentially true, since she's now also trying to take my friends away from me, because one more week and I'll probably snap and I really don't want that.

I hate the fact that she has been able to push me this far. I'll never be able to care for another girl again probably, goddamned.

 

I reckon you just think he's cute.If you seriously were considering that then I suggest you seek help to cure yourself of such thoughts.I'm sorry you feel that way though,I hope you can get through it for both your sakes :hugz:

 

I reckon you just think he's cute.If you seriously were considering that then I suggest you seek help to cure yourself of such thoughts.I'm sorry you feel that way though,I hope you can get through it for both your sakes :hugz: [/b][/quote]
, it's not THAT serious, hahaha. It was more fun than anything else, lmfao.

 

, it's not THAT serious, hahaha. It was more fun than anything else, lmfao. [/b][/quote]
Well you presented your post in a serious way

 

If I lash out at anyone over the most trivial of matters, please understand that things over at my end have been incredibly heated. Thanks in advance.

 

I got a better alternative : sit at a table in a locked room and talk things out till all is solved. When you put the problems aside they may come back later. If you solve them they won't.

 

Not really.

Just distance your selves from each other, and ignore each other at all costs. Don't talk to each other for any reason.

It worked for me and my ex.

 

I'm Gay! lol j/k lmao.

 

Wow. You are so.fucking.funny.

 

ok......






I just realized that I usually don't do anything unless I have to. I just sit around telling myself I should do stuff and I don't. I'm the most unmotivated person I know.

 

I got a better alternative : sit at a table in a locked room and talk things out till all is solved. When you put the problems aside they may come back later. If you solve them they won't. [/b][/quote]
yeah but from what i've read. they have tried that many times before. so i just suggest going opposite ways, and if in the future your paths cross again then deal with it then. but right now it doesnt look like they will be able to work things out, no matter what. so it might be easier on the both of you to just leave the other alone.