RainMaker *poem*

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by Sexy_Kittie_722, Jan 6, 2006.

  1. #1
    Sexy_Kittie_722

    Sexy_Kittie_722 Banned

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    RainMaker

    Rain Rain Rain go away
    Oh rain rain rain go away
    Please for me go away
    let my light shine for one day

    Rain rain rain go away
    for the Iam to shine today
    Rain rain rain go away
    for today I wanna shine
    and smile and laugh for the ones
    who love me

    Rain rain rain go away
    for today I want to shine
    Rain rain rain for the I am
    sleeping as since my day to shine
    never comes
    I weep in hope to shine one day

    Rain rain rain go away
    for today is my day to shine
    let the sun come and play
    for today is my day

    Rain rain go away or I will never
    wake for those who care and love me
    cause your bring me down to sleep
    with your rain oh rainmaker please
    for one day let me shine please
    let the sun shine for me to shine

    Rain rain rain Rainmaker
    please let the sunshine
    so I can shine today

    by,Bec

    Ps:feedback please
     
  2. #2
    Wyrms

    Wyrms New Member

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    I like the message of isolation, and the desire which grew from a pure form of patience.

    There are many fixable grammar mistakes and lack of punctuation, but as for the poem as a whole, it's simple, but that's why I like it. :)
     

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