Timing

Discussion in 'Chester Bennington' started by Autumn, Jun 8, 2018.

  1. #1
    Autumn

    Autumn Member

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    As a kid, I was a huge LP fan. Listened to them all the time. As I grew older the music my friends listened to started to take influence, and I didn't listen to any LP for a while.
    One year and 4 months ago my fiance hanged himself. I found him, tried to save him, but was too late. A few months later I rediscovered Linkin Park. Now struggling with my own severe depression and substance abuse among other things, these songs now have a way deeper meaning to me than I could have ever imagined. They are actually the only thing that brings some sort of comfort to me, and have almost a calming effect. I don't know if that's strange but it's true.
    Then about 6 months after the love of my life hangs himself, to learn Chester had done the same was just kind of a surreal feeling. After going years without LP, to listening to them every single day again, and then another unfathomable death occurs. The timing of it all was just really strange for me, and really hit home.

    I will always regret never attending a LP show. Watching videos, the charisma Chester brought to every one is just inspiring. And such a good person, too.

    I just pre ordered Mike Shinoda's new CD, and I really look forward to seeing what else he comes out with.

    Anyway, that's all.

    Thanks for reading.
     
    Last edited: Jun 8, 2018
  2. #2
    The Free Element

    The Free Element Well-Known Member

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    Last night I tried to write something here, but everything felt like out of place, 'cause I can't fully understand what you're going through. Just, I'm sorry for you loss and I hope you're seeking the right help. Don't give up.
     
  3. #3
    Autumn

    Autumn Member

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    Thanks. I appreciate it. It's definitely an everyday battle. And I wouldn't wish that kind of understanding on anyone. I just wanted to say how grateful I am for this music. Hope I didn't make anyone....uncomfortable.
     
  4. #4
    Derek

    Derek LPAssociation.com Administrator LPA Administrator

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    You definitely didn't make any of us uncomfortable, and if anything you're doing something most people feel too afraid to do when they're struggling: ask for help, and talk about their struggles. Chester's death certainly hit us all in different ways, and I can only imagine the pain you must be feeling having both your fiance and Chester both pass away by suicide. Just know that, as hopeless as it may seem sometimes, Chester would want you to fight. It's exactly the reason he chose to be so open with his pain, because as hard as his struggles may have been on him personally, his wish was to help others.

    Keep fighting, and know we're all here for you. You matter.
     
  5. #5
    Autumn

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    Thank you. For your kind words, to a complete stranger.
     

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